6 Dominatrices on How They Stay Fit
“I also am pretty strong for my size, which is awesome for things like an over-the-knee spanking and heavy corporal punishment.”
For such a famously sex-mad series, one of the most important parts of E L James Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy surprisingly isn’t blindfolds and handcuffs — it’s food and exercise. Ana often forgets to eat or doesn’t eat when she’s nervous, and Christian comes from an abusive childhood background where he often went hungry. And he’s always telling her to work out and eat to “keep her strength up” for their rough sex sessions.
Curious if real life kinksters are that obsessed with food and exercise, I called up six of my fellow pro dominatrices to weigh in: Mal Martine, HRH Countess Cane, Ms Slide, Goddess Capri von Chic, Kitty Stryker, and Annalise Barrett.
So tell me about your fitness routine.
Mal Martine (pictured above):
I work out nearly every day. Each day is something different. I try to be consistent and go to the gym three days a week for cardio and weight training. This includes squats and deadlifting. Other days I may only do a 10-minute Pilates set at home. And one day a week I go for yoga. This routine keeps my general sense of well-being quite high — it does more for me than any other thing that I can think of. I’m calm and able to manage the emotional needs of my clients much better. I also am pretty strong for my size, which is awesome for things like an over-the-knee spanking and heavy corporal punishment.
I get up each day, have my coffee, a low carb protein shake, and off to the gym I go. As a domina, many times when I am doing rope bondage on my submissive, I am maneuvering and positioning someone who may weigh in excess of 200 lbs. and that does require physical strength. I lift weights and then do cardio on either the recumbent bike or elliptical trainer. I do this six days a week.
Goddess Capri von Chic: I am part-time military and a part-time alternative/fitness model; being in shape has been mandatory for those positions, not so much so for being a professional dominatrix. I do three days of cardio — Mondays, Thursdays, and Sundays — where I run 1.5 to 2 miles. I have a love/hate relationship with running but it is [the] best, especially for endurance — and I believe endurance is a dominatrix’s secret weapon. I also ride a stationary bike and swim.
I do three days of yoga and dance, pole dancing classes, and an hour of pilates. This keeps my core tight and sexy. I don’t know if this has any other effect, other than aesthetic. I do three days of free weights — my upper arms, upper legs/thighs, and calves. I believe this allows me to add a little extra force when needed, i.e. when needing to intensify spankings, whippings, etc. I usually get harder and harder throughout the session.
Personally I love yoga. For the work I do, flexibility and endurance is particularly useful! I also enjoy playing my Wii Fit, going to long walks, and, erm, having rather a lot of sweaty sex.
I have yoga and Pilates classes twice a week, in addition to walking everywhere I reasonably can. Being a sex worker was critical for me to even have an exercise routine — I don’t think I would have started on it if I didn’t think it would improve my business, and I’ve lost about 25 pounds since entering the industry.
I often lift weights. It isn’t specifically for work reasons, but I do like to stay physically strong.
Tell me about your diet — how do you eat over an average week? Do you have any special meals before or after a session?
Mal: In general I eat a high-protein, low-carb diet, though I don’t skimp on rice. I eat lots of leafy greens, and during the winter I eat a lot of fatty fish and bone broths. I find that eating this way allows me to maintain the muscle I’m building. After a session, especially a long one, I tend to get meals with friends to decompress. I’m lucky that my best friend is also a sex worker, a constant dining companion, and workout partner.
Countess Cane: I find staying away from refined sugar and keeping my processed carbohydrates at a reasonable level are my best approach. Don’t get me wrong, I love my cupcakes too, but an over-consumption of “bad” carbs at the wrong time can put me into a state of over-relaxation (sugar high) and make me want to just veg out. As for fats, I highly recommend raw coconut oil for everything from cooking to even using it as a skin and hair care product.
I do recommend one “cheat day” during the week, usually Sunday, whereby I eat whatever I want for a meal. Usually, I might be looking for some great Mexican food with all the goodies, and bring on the margaritas! I also rest from working out on Sunday.
Goddess Capri: I try to eat more organically than not. I eat three meals a day, and I usually only eat fast food once a week, if that much. I like a well-balanced meal, and I love fruits and vegetables and nuts. I love concord and red 100-percent grape juice (white is too sweet for me) — it’s my secret weapon. The anti-aging properties keep my skin glowing and looking young. Also, WATER. WATER, WATER, WATER, every chance you get to drink.
Kitty: I tend to eat a mostly vegetarian diet, with occasional fish and chicken and very occasional pork. I can’t eat beef at all and cheese/cream sauces often make me queasy, so it’s a lot of broccoli for me! Before a session I tend to eat a protein granola bar so I don’t feel weighed down but have the energy for the scene. It’s funny, as I’m a fat woman, yet I eat better than most people I know who are considered “healthy” because they’re slender.
Annalise: I stick to a strict gluten-free ketogenic diet — less than 30 grams of carbs a day, no starches or sugars, minimal fruit, high fiber vegetables, and lots of healthy plant and animal protein and fat sources, like nuts, fish, avocado, butter, bacon, cheese, etc. Trying to keep my calories in check, but long days in grad school don’t help! I don’t eat any special way before a session unless my client wants to go out to dinner, which means not eating in the hours prior because restaurant food is so often laced with excess calories.
Ms Slide: I’m a vegetarian and like to eat relatively healthily, though I often have cake, a cup of tea, and sometimes a few glasses of wine with other dommes after a group session. It’s become something of a tradition.
How would you describe your body type? Is there a sense of competition to look a certain way in the BDSM community?
Mal: I am an ectomorph, slim and small-boned. I’ve always been underweight and struggle to keep it on. This is why weight training and eating a higher-protein diet have worked for me. I am comfortable with my androgyny and the fact that I will never be what I idealize which is a more voluptuous body type, but I appreciate it in other women.
Countess Cane: Having been in and around the scene for a very long time, I went from being a skinny little “baby domme” to a full-figured, mature woman. Although, I do find that the stronger and more developed and built I am, the heavier the session I acquire — someone who wants some serious corporal punishment will most likely look to a woman who looks strong, rather than a waif. BDSM is a vast arena and there is room for women of all body-types, ages, looks, and styles.
Goddess Capri: I’m 5-foot-7, slender, and toned with a little bit of curves in the hips and breast. I don’t see it as a competition; people like what they like. When I was first starting out, I looked around for (professional) houses that wouldn’t mind teaching me and promoting me. One of the first things I was told is that, because I am African-American, most white subordinates prefer the black dommes to play a “mammie” role. Mammies are usually much larger in size than I am. That house still considered me to work for them, but I decided to go out on my own instead, and I haven’t had a problem with gaining clientele. I know of plenty of African-American dommes who are all shapes and sizes, so I guess, like with anything else, it’s the customer’s choice.
Kitty: I’m fat. There’s a lot of euphemisms for it but I’m OK with fat. I’ve found pro domming in the U.K. to be one of the areas where my fatness is not seen as detrimental, but I do think a lot of men in particular feel their worth depends on the sexual capital of the women in their lives. I’ve definitely felt wistful that I would make more money if I was slender.
Annalise: Yes, I feel pressured to be as slim as possible, so I diet and exercise. I don’t believe that there is a such thing as competition in this industry, mostly “competing” against myself, if you will.
Ms Slide: I’d describe myself as fairly petite with rounded edges and squidgy bits. The stereotypical image of the long, narrow, supermodel dominatrix isn’t something there’s any pressure, financial or otherwise, to conform to. The BDSM world is pleasingly inclusive and there’s a wonderful diversity of body shapes and sizes in professional domination and in the kink scene in general. It’s everything we are that makes us powerful, both mentally and physically.[fblike]