Over time, Sarah continued to expertly apply her leadership at home and also at her new job as Vice President of a global textile company. Michael grew as well, focusing his passion and drive on submitting to his wife. Sarah slowly introduced, in their Female-Led Relationship, semen retention in coordination with tease and denial – a potent combination that elevated sexual arousal for both of them. Michael, not having nearly the Dopamine he once did from daily masturbation, was much more attentive to Sarah’s desires. Sarah filled the gap by teasing Michael randomly: at work, at the market, in the car, when out for walks, etc. They began to shower together, and Michael learned how to treat Sarah’s bath like a ceremony.
It wasn’t all perfect, but things seemed to be going very well. That is, until one night Sarah got out of bed to go to the bathroom and noticed Michael wasn’t in bed. Thinking he went to dig into the banana pudding she had made for dessert, Sarah decided she could go for a spoonful as well and headed toward the kitchen. However, she found Michael not with a bowl of pudding, but with a handful of cock, masturbating on the couch. Fully engrossed in the porn on the large-screen TV: he hadn’t noticed her approach.
Disobedience and Betrayal!
Sarah didn’t know what to do. On one hand, she saw an opportunity to watch, if not join her lover. It could be fun! However, there was also the reality that he was violating her rules. “You will not orgasm without my permission” kept going through her mind, pushing out any opportunity to turn this event into something positive.
This was disobedience. Betrayal! It could not be permitted to continue, lest she lose more respect. “If he doesn’t respect me here, where else should I be worrying about… and when?” She thought. Sarah also knew that, in her current state, confronting Michael wasn’t going to get her the results she wanted, so she quietly went back to bed thinking about what to do.
At that Sunday’s breakfast, Michael made it a point to mention Sarah’s sudden coldness and how she seemed indifferent to his affection.
She said in a tone that betrayed her anger,
- “Michael, I saw you jacking off on the couch earlier this week. I’ve been trying to figure out how to deal with it.”
- “What’s the big deal?” Michael exclaimed “It hurts nothing… I didn’t want to wake you and just needed a quick release…”
Importance of Discipline in a Female-Led Relationship
- “The big deal is that you violated my rule. You had an orgasm without my permission. You said you would obey, Michael, and you didn’t. Do you know what that says to me? What does it do to me? We enjoy a better relationship now than we ever have, and it’s because there is mutual respect between us. But this…” as she waves her hand in a jacking-off motion “this is not respect. It is denying me the immediate pleasure of sex and longer-term denial by intentionally disconnecting our intimacy! You put another woman in front of me!”
- “It’s not like that at all! Look, it’s just…”
- “It is like that, Michael!” Sarah snapped. “Just because sex for you is transactional doesn’t mean that it’s transactional for me! We are married and no other man, on a TV screen or not, comes between us. I don’t get that respect from you, and it hurts. It is BETRAYAL, Michael, even if you don’t see it!”
- “Sarah… I’m sorry… truly. I didn’t know that it meant so much and… I don’t know… I fucked up! I’m sorry… I should have been more sensitive to how you feel about it.”
- “No, you should have just followed the damned rules. If you don’t understand why they are in place you had a million opportunities to bring it up, including Sunday breakfast. Discipline is looking back a year from now and being thankful that you never quit because you know you’re in a place few others go. You quit – you quit on yourself and you quit on me.”
Set of New rules in their Female-Led Relationship
Michael, understanding that he was trivializing Sarah’s emotions humbled himself by kneeling in front of her. Looking at the floor he quietly said:
- “I’m sorry Sarah… I didn’t realize. I’m sorry… what can I do to make this better?”
Sarah did not waste time ensuring the sanctity of her house was reinforced by Michael’s behavior. Over the course of the next several weeks, she created rules that specifically aimed at getting their relationship back on track and eliminating recurrences of damaging behavior.
Rule 7: You will be fitted for chastity: keeping you locked is keeping you interested
And for those times when Michael was allowed to be unlocked…
Rule 6: You will not touch your genitals without permission except to clean
And…
Rule 8: Porn ban – no pornography without permission
With the above rules, Sarah intended to expand the depth and connection of Michael’s submission to her. Like previous rules, Michael initially resisted her authority and, like the previous discussions, Sarah built rock-solid arguments that compelled compliance. After all, Michael worked himself into this situation. What is more is: that he admitted to himself that life was more rich and enjoyable now than when they were dating!
As the couple continued maturing in their Female-Led Relationship, Sarah slowly and carefully continued to enforce her will. Surprisingly, Michael took the lead one Sunday breakfast…
- “I don’t like hoping everything went well during the week.” Michael offered… “If I screw up, I want you to tell me about it sooner so that I don’t have to worry until Sunday.”
Interested, Sarah inquired:
- “And what about the punishment?”
Excitedly, Michael started in:
- “So I’ve been thinking about that. We have an active life and may not have time for punishment during the week. That said, keeping everything until Sunday may cause fear or regret for what has always been an enjoyable day. So tell me what I did wrong at the time it’s done and let’s make either Friday or Saturday night a weekly punishment session – that way I don’t get away with displeasing you and you are confident there is time to address any wrongs?”
Sarah was beyond pleased with these suggestions. Now she could have an entire evening to both punish and entice her lover. She quickly offered additions that made Michael’s ideas a concrete part of their Female-Led Relationship:
Rule 9: Weekly disciplinary sessions
Rule 10: Accept the punishment Appendix 1: List of punishments
Now, with well-known and agreed-upon standards for discipline and punishment, Michael and Sarah were free to relieve themselves of the awkward burden of figuring out when/where to ensure the relationship was to stay in balance. Knowing and routinely reflecting on the rules created a kind of natural equilibrium to their activities which reduced friction (and violations). Sarah also began to see the effects of Michael slipping into subspace and sought out resources to help her manage his aftercare.
In time, becoming increasingly disciplinarian made both Sarah and Michael happier. They both knew exactly what to expect and each got exactly what they wanted. Any derivations were corrected and then forgotten – neither of them kept anger past the weekly session. There was one issue, however: Sarah wanted a way to amplify her name without jeopardizing the Female-Led Relationship while around friends and family.
Discussing it with Michael over breakfast, they agreed that other rules were required in order to separate the real world from their world:
Rule 11: The submissive will refer to the Dominant as “Mistress” at all times save specific exceptions
The couple determined that trying to explain the Female-Led Relationship dynamic to friends and family was too much of a chore, so names will be used to identify the role that is required. When Michael calls Sarah “Mistress”, his tone immediately conveys respect and submission. This honors Sarah and her place at the head of the relationship. When Sarah refers to Michael as “my pet”, he immediately shifts his mindset into a submissive state, thereby facilitating understanding and respect.
Rule 12: Opinions are welcome, arguments are not
Sarah loves and is in love with Michael; she respects his unique perspective and desires his input on complicated and important issues. However, when her mind is made up, she is owning the responsibility for that decision – Michael respects this by not challenging Sarah. If Sarah makes a bad call, they work as a team to deal with any consequences and continue to move forward – no arguments or petty oneupmanship (e.g., “I told you so!”) is required or desired.
The couple grew into the Female-Led Relationship by seeking and incorporating advice from expert coaches. Thanks to the Internet, a wealth of information (some accurate, some not so much) gave them a nearly endless supply of knowledge to draw from. Putting this new knowledge into practice became a perpetual source of entertainment and enrichment. Like when Sarah sent Michael to work one day with a remotely operated plug and teased him relentlessly.
Constant evolution of their Female-Led Relationship
Michael took a while to get used to being in chastity. Once he started seeing the cage as an extension of his Mistress’s hand, however, there were no issues. Sarah, ever conscious of Michael’s needs, expanded her control (and his hole), bringing them so close that neither could imagine a life without the other. There were nearly zero arguments: what could either argue about when both so completely satisfied each other’s needs?
A short time later, the couple decided to formalize their rules into a kind of contract. To mark the special occasion of signing the contract, they planned an immediate vacation to Europe. There, they planned out activities like seeing various historical sites, meeting their FLR coach face-to-face at a chateau for the weekend, and renewing wedding vows that incorporated FLR elements. Oh, they may have quietly bought tickets to Torture Garden as well.
Kink on!
This story shows the strength of a FLR that we men are always in need of rules and someone to enforce them